Getting Friended

There has been a lot of talk about a particular phenomena in the world of boy-girl relationships, and this post, by popular request, (that's Marc Nielson, the most popular guy I know) addresses this issue.

So let me tell you a little bit about "friending." Here on the BYU scene where hormones rage like the beach at high tide, we've got to be able to put up our defenses against creepers. What's the best defense? One may wonder. The answer: Friending.

I like friending. It's a nice tool to let other people know where you stand, as well as a good way to know whether you're wasting your time and money with a girl. And frankly, down here in Happy Valley, it's a necessity.

So how do you know you're being friended? Well, when your main squeeze starts talking to you about the boy or girl they like... you've been friended. When hanging out with girls, sometimes a boy other than yourself will text those girls. If they get giddy right in front of you... friend-zone. When they say stuff like "hey friend!" Yeah. You know they used the word "friend" on purpose.

If somebody you like stops returning your phonecalls, you haven't been friended... You're probably getting punished for stalking them. My advice would be to break off contact completely.

So anyways, that's friending. Use it with discretion.

Oh, and once you've entered the friend-zone, just know that there's no going back. That's really bad form. In other words, if you friend somebody, don't try to cuddle with them, don't try to interdigitate with them, and for heaven's sake don't kiss them! Come on. You know better than that. Stuff like that is for people who are more than friends.